The Gift of Time: How to Get More From Less

The Christmas season is upon us. And nowhere is this more evident than at the mall. I am not talking about the decorations; I am talking about people out to find the next best thing to add to all the other things they already have. With wish lists that could put Santa to shame. Some don’t even bother to wait for Santa (or whoever) to buy the gifts for them. They simply gift them to themselves.

Of course, people are also out there buying gifts for others. Anything from gag gifts, puppies, jewelry, electronics, even automobiles. There is certainly no shortage of things people can buy, even if there might be a shortage in the bank account. Amazon is a global giant for a reason.

It can be nice to be both giver and receiver. I used to love finding the cutest puppets for my nieces and nephews when they were little. All you needed was a bit of imagination to bring the stories to life. Or I’d find a sweet little outfit for them to wear. I used to have so much fun being on the hunt for the perfect gift for them.

But there was also a lot of mindless giving. You know, when you feel a compulsion to buy something, so you buy the closest thing at hand, or something you liked, spend more on it than you probably wanted, just to have something to give. Or everyone simply gave gifts to everyone, resulting in the giving and receiving of many unnecessary things.

Don’t get me wrong, getting a beautiful, thoughtful gift from a friend can be quite memorable. In fact, all the mugs in my cupboard were at one time gifted to me by others. And when I take a sip from any of them, I call to mind the person who gave it to me.

Yet, I have so many mugs now that many of them are tucked away, out of use. I simply don’t have room for all of them. The older I get the more I feel weighted down by stuff. I feel anxiety owning too many things. It’s a constant battle to create peace in my life since clutter brings me down in a way unlike anything else. Many of the things I own were once gifted to me. Sure, they hold sentimental value, but I don’t need most of the items I’ve been given. For instance, houseplants can seem like a nice gesture, but I feel the constant weight of struggling to keep them alive. Hey, I didn’t sign up to be a plant parent. Or an accidental plant murderer.

Some gifts still sit in their unopened boxes, with me uncertain of what to do with them next. I have regifted several things, given them to Goodwill, because again, it is all the stuff that gives me anxiety. I have reached a point in my life where I want to cull the things I have, not add to the pile. I feel most content in a minimalist environment.

At this point, you might liken me to the Grinch from the Dr. Seuss book, “The Grinch Who Stole Christmas.” Or think I am being an ungrateful bee-otch. I am really trying not to be. I just value my space and the few things I choose to have in it. I consider the following great ideas if you do need to give someone a physical something: gift cards (though these can get forgotten, misplaced, or expire before you get to use them); fresh baked goods or other food stuffs; alcohol; cut flowers.

In my minimalism, I find I have also become more mindful in the gifts I get for others, because they also don’t need a lot of stuff. I have started to shift away from buying gifts of stuff to gifts of time. And what I mean by that is that instead of buying another trinket for my mother who lives in a small two-bedroom apartment, I buy tickets to a concert, a theatre play, or ice-skating event—things that involve us being together. I buy the gift of time, because what I need more than stuff is connections with other people.

Instead of mailing you a care package, I’d rather get myself on a plane to visit you. I am giving the gift of time.

Instead of buying a present for my niece who has everything, I take her out for dinner. I am giving the gift of time, creating memories for both of us to cherish. Yet, I think, even better than taking someone out for dinner is having them over for dinner. I find I am doing this less and less and yet it more cost-effective to host a dinner than go out, and you are not on a set time limit by which you need to give up your seat for the next diners. You can have a longer time together if you entertain in your own home.

Another idea that I really love as far as giving goes, is donating to a charity in someone else’s name or honour. I have done this in the past (last week even) and I think it is a fabulous idea to put your money somewhere where it helps others. Many charity organizations have Christmas catalogues from which you can pick and choose items in a variety of dollar amounts to appeal to any level of generosity and one’s disposable income.

How do you approach the holiday season? Do you feel some of the same anxiety around too many things? I encourage you, reader, to think about the gifts you give. Do you give the gifts of stuff, or the gifts of time? Of course, there is a time and a place for both. I am no Grinch after all. Just know that the receiver would most likely rather have you than the thing.